Do you know a tennis player in your area who is at the same level you are and has the same skill set that you do (…same strokes, same level of experience), but you’re terrified about facing him because you’ve been beaten by him the last few times in a row and fear that he might defeat you again… giving you an even bigger headache than before?

I mean, even though you’re virtually the same in every aspect like health, athletic ability, and overall game, one frustrating question is continuously swirling around in your brain and seems like it’ll never go away; “Why Can’t I Beat Him… EVER?

I bet you probably start to feel that you’re probably  just deficient in some unknown regard. And it’s killing you because you have no clue on how to fix it.  And then doubt sets in, and you begin to just accept that you can’t stand up to that particular opponent, am I right?

You start to avoid matches with them and even pretend you don’t see them when they show up on the court so they have no chance to say those words that make you cringe… “Hey, wanna play?” Why?

Because you already perceive what the outcome is going to be, a LOSS! And you don’t want to be put through that type of embarrassment anymore. I mean, who would?

But hey, don’t get too down on yourself. You’re not alone. This is a typical situation faced by literally every tennis player that has swung a racket.

In fact, I’ve witnessed the same thing myself and that’s why I can easily understand how you’re feeling. You want to know why this is happening to you? YOUR MIND IS OUT OF CONTROL. Let me explain.

A while back, I was the top players at one of the earlier tennis clubs I was a member of… until a friend of mine decided he wanted in too. We were both equal in skill and had almost the same number of wins under our belts.

When we first started playing, I lost a couple matches against him (…back to back). At that point, Randy was promoted to the top position on the team. Yea, my spot!

That really started to eat at me. I mean, I was top dog, then I dropped to #2 faster than I could blink my eye. I then started to doubt myself and even thought about leaving for another club across town or even in another state. An athlete’s ego is fragile haha, especially when you’re as competitive as you and me.

But no, I didn’t leave. I stuck with it, hoping it would get better. But in our next meeting, I started to make tons of mistakes that even more than before. As you can imagine, I got REALLY bummed out, and incredibly frustrated.

I really don’t like to lose. I actually despise it. So, I had to do something to change it and start winning again. After all, I couldn’t just sit there and do what I’d been doing and expect something different to happen. That’d be insane

So after a couple days of some intense thinking, I realized that the problem didn’t have anything to do with my strokes at all.

It was all happening between my ears. I was giving Randy the victory before we even stepped foot on the court. I was thinking too much about things that didn’t matter like past matches I lost against him, and how embarrassed I ‘d feel if I lost AGAIN, how awful it would be to see his stupid face grinning back at me at the end, and God forbid, I drop to #3!!!!

At first, I thought that highlighting those ideas would light a fire under me and give me the extra push to do better, but all it did was disturb my mental stability and decrease my confidence level. Why?

Because I was playing, hoping NOT TO LOSE instead of unleashing the killer instinct to WIN! When you do that, your anxiety level skyrockets. My body and muscles were tight before I even hit my first ball. This was the reason I was making so many stupid “unforced” errors.

But once I understood the problem, that I was focusing too much on him and NOT on the game, it helped me to turn things around pretty fast.

In my next match with him, I tried directing my focus to any and everything except my opponent: the ball, my racket, my shoes, the sidelines, anything but him. I didn’t want him in my thoughts at all, because it could trigger a response that I definitely needed to keep under wraps.

Without a doubt, it was mentally exhausting, but it definitely did the job. This approach helped me a lot as I wasn’t focusing my attention on him anymore.

I instead was more focused on my game,  the ball, its movements, my overall court coverage and my shot selection.

The idea is to de-clutter and eliminate the space occupied by your opponent and how badly you want to beat him by re-directing your internal energy on things that won’t distract you.

You’re there to play the points – one point at a time. The only portion of your opponent you should be focusing on are his weaknesses and figuring out a way to destroy and exploit them blow by blow. Or I should say stroke by stroke.

This seemed to solve my problem and I actually won that match 6-1, 6-3! We played a couple of matches after that, and there were few that I won and a few which I lost.

But this time, I only lost the match because he was just playing better. Maybe luck was on his side or maybe it wasn’t my day. However,  I didn’t lose any of the matches because I was busy worrying whether I would win or loose against my opponent.

You should take this approach whenever you face a similar problem. It doesn’t matter whether you’re a tennis player, boxer, wrestler or chess player; just remember that everything lies in your mind. You have to have full control on your emotions by:

1. Starting With A Clean Slate: Look at each match as a new beginning, and don’t bog your mind down with any negative events that happened prior to you coming out on the court that day. That will only send you sprinting losing direction at full speed. Dwelling on the past just adds clutter. For example, if you lost to that guy or girl in the past, it means nothing to you. Understand me? What’s done is done. You can only control what is in front of you. Nothing else deserves your attention on that day but that opponent and the strategy, positioning, court coverage, etc you need to beat him THAT DAY. 2. Visualizing yourself winning: See yourself attaining your goal. We tend to do or at the very least gravitate towards whatever we focus our mind on. So, if you see yourself hitting great ground strokes, striking great serves, making the right choices, giving your opponent fits and going after his weaknesses by using great strategy, and ultimately moving onto the next round, that’ll most likely be likely be your destiny. On the other hand, if you see yourself losing the match and wondering how on earth are you going to beat this guy? You’ll probably find yourself moping around afterward screaming the “shouda , coulda wouldas” Got me? NOT FUN. 3. Focusing on YOU: While playing a match, all you have to focus on is playing YOUR game and executing your shots. Don’t allow yourself to think about the opponent too much. If you have trouble doing it, as you might very well at first,  try keeping your eyes on something other than your opponent by fixing your gaze on something else like, the ball, your wrist bands, or your shoes etc. 4. Saying The Heck With “What Ifs”: Don’t worry about the what ifs. What if he ace’s me? What if I lose? What if I don’t win this game? Deal with what IS happening. Concentrating on the gray area that may never happen in the first place is a big waste of your time, and mental energy!Whatever happens, you still have to  do like Melanie Oudin and keep fighting! So, whatever happens will happen. But just deal with it when it actually becomes a reality for you. And when it does happen, don’t panic. Just analyze the situation and make your adjustments, and you’ll be great.

So yea, focus on what matters, you playing well and executing what you’ve worked on in practice. Do this from the first  point to the last point, and you’ll achieve great results.  And don’t get upset if he hits an incredible shot from time to time.

Look at it this way, this player makes you nervous and uneasy to start with right? So you’ll already be on edge. These 4 strategies above will help you keep your cool and will help strengthen your emotional control.

And once you have full control over all your emotions, then it won’t matter if your partner is on the same level as you or even “better” then you. You’ll be able to give yourself a fighting chance every single time!

Remember, it’s not just about physical strength or mechanics; every match is a mind game! What do they say? It’s the inside that counts… wink . Exactly!

Have a great day and an even BETTER game.

Brian Hall,

Your Tennis Mind Coach

Tagged as: mental strategies, mental tennis, tennis mental toughness, tennis mind, tennis strategy